The Zookeeper 2: Problems with Poo

By Brian Looney

Remember your Zookeeper?
Well, my mind's still black and blue.

I think I'll tell you about a problem I have.

It concerns the stench of poo.

I'd thought i'd experienced all
I'd thought there was nothing new

But today I chanced to ponder
At that immortal butt brew.

Now I know how to feed my beastly crew
I surely feed them well.

So there is zero reason
For that nauseating smell

Yet when I enter the restroom,
The stable doors are closed.

And one can glimpse the creatures
Squatting with no clothes.

I see what they are doing,
In there all alone,
Publicly perched
On the porceline throne.

Discomfort has struck them
From days of old
In the meantime,
Their feed grows cold.

The groaning animal puts up a fight
And my mind's eye triumphs at its plight.

Yet my revolted nose won't stop twitching.
This is the main reason for all of my bitching.

What makes a beast think I want to deal
With its retched post-meal?

Always, always, those putrid fumes
Seep through doors, wander into rooms.

And you know I just can't stand it!

Hey Boss!
I hate their Shit.
From now on I'm only serving Cheese.

That'll slow them down a bit.
And promote a fresh bathroom breeze.

Or I could rope off the stall
And block their vile ingress

So when the beasts trot in haste
I'll laugh, I must confess.

Now don't get angry; it was only a thought!
How am I supposed to work, enveloped in their rot?

I'm the Zookeeper,
And I can only hope for the worst.
I hope their swelled intestines burst.